01-12-18 Seg 1 Mens Room Can't Hold It

Friday, January 12th

Mens Room Question: Whether it was you or someone else, what was your epic fart story​

00:26:22

Transcript - Not for consumer use. Robot overlords only. Will not be accurate.

He would sure love to hear is real. Trying to offend anyone. There's our. Lord. Invited to join the party. This easy. In secrecy. They say. A radio more than. Have you Leo look at this November 2747. Flawless even throw him. Do you Ted Smith and Long Island and by Cox. Yeah I'd amend a. Yeah today here from the bad jokes bridges the return of Ted vs the FCC. Get ready to play profile list plus headlines and injured shot of the day fumbled as their emails and everyone's favorite TV time would tip click clack did they drag I knew ago Coca-Cola announcers boy are no flavors and a brand new canvas. So millennial well actually buy their stuff. The mayor of Vancouver won't run for reelection because he can't afford to live in Vancouver day and that's pretty. Pennsylvania couple let's get a luggage and tries to fly out of town but meanwhile micro cheating includes dressing really nice when someone you think gets hot there's around the an army goes to war what hockey that is all coming on today's very special episode of the men's room. Here's a question. All adventure is good day aid to use Ed yours are right scientist in Australia. They just successfully tested in electronic pills but you swallow. To monitor the flatulence in your stomach. And it you can watch the gas forming in real time on your phone now the sad news sad sad news. It'll be at least a few years before it hits the market so in other words in a few years I will finally have a new app on my phone. Now a lot of people like to pretend that they don't far from the won't talk about it these people quite simply are damn liars and damn fools. Because not only does everyone fared for the average person or fourteen. Times today. Close to the map on and it say you work with a I don't know for other people but about seventy potential for today that's the only way. And that doesn't include people you might see a long way. But in spite of it's your ball you know flatulence that real deal with the is that one part but what are good you'll always remember and we remember different farms. For different reasons sometimes it can just the smell the obvious stuff. Sometimes it's just the sound to me or the location in the or maybe the timing of for example toward them funeral not a great idea. Either way today we're talking about. Memorable for experiences and this is what we want and whether it was you or someone else. What is your epic 42 story Big Brother jump by 44999. Alone like humans are on FaceBook follow us on two under immense remind fans and those emails to the men's room had been through my Dhaka. You are listening to the men's or radio network. All the dog now I know I'm gonna show number 2000 740. Similar large and charged program we've got three today and bad jokes are coming right cancel the drug in charge of B indicate golf bad jokes and the return of Ted vs the FCC and today on the question of we're talking about your epic far too moment whether from you or someone else. What is your epic fart store regular order by. Resentment Demi does some far it's absolutely go above and beyond anything that you think of far would do in this is. This is actually true but believe it or not the size zero inspiration for today's story of inspiration from story will bring you coming up but. This morning my daughter is going to school and that the rule I have of the kids is when we greet each other always say goodbye WB trailer I'm gonna catch right and and I like the rule of what reduce our squat Darryl and to give her a hug and actually she runs over gives her a hug in the channel since my my left leg. I guess seven squatting position and she does back. A lot of the times initial chat with me in this morning she said. She sits down my leg as she goes hanging on a site over her words and I looked better. A new of those that universal look that everyone has been performing and you see her eyes come they go all but the country's corner. In my mare and I'm like that's the far FaceBook my daughter wouldn't. But get the hell are for me and it didn't matter what I said from this point she was laughing so hard like. It was impossible for her to get in trouble like if I call the cops and there are a lot of corruption would laugh all the way to prison totally. Why ain't. Did you do that you know that I realized the reason she did that is because she observes me hates those got a smoking she fart on people but beyond that. Which she doesn't know and I made this decision today because she part of army it was intentional that you park she took the time to push it out. Just a part of my leg she thought was hilarious and white. She's just open a can of worms that she's going to regret and because I did for her into a coma she has no idea and are bad you bring in the heat so brutal for war. It's been over this time she's gonna win. Over time Genzyme or. Nor far it's that the exit will get looser. Well done away or they attacked the girl you just get into prime party time nor does it teenagers too far tracks off the way I see it loses Harding or ask a I got loose stools that she don't pollute but in and it's weird because they're not moment only I cannot believe she just Fargo and I mean it and look she's far deny me before the number on purpose it least as far as I know. Today was definitively a purpose and I fought like I'm not angry I'm not particularly pleased but. Oddly enough 80% of B is for yeah you don't read this this is weird thing I haven and you know. You can't just go around to do that people just because I do and I are around three or four armed people normally. Why do I feel so proud I don't want to be proud of this. I'm I'm trying to encourage them but. I didn't learn about Dell's note those they we we went below the white that I went many years ago on a a couple days away skiing. So about Canada and just like anything else center full day of skiing whether you're in shape or not you are sort you're just you know your body is your your pretty fatigued and everything. I was in the first night we were there was a much Saturday night or Friday night. And anytime we want to go to the hot tub. And and attend your big hug to a guy Obama. It was just packed into enemy knows just it was a and you outdoor hot dog outdoor hot dusty outdoor. Nina in the pools not that cold either but it's cold it's still cold if but but it's not as cold hot tub as is wonderful but we couldn't get America goes pack. The base the people just go in there and you had ordered drinks you can bring pictures out they give you plastic cups and plastic pitchers. You can go out there and you can drink beer and not well we could get in the hot tubs so the last night we were there when the Sunday night or something. There's only two dudes and so I'm like guy hey let's go to their man we that we get the hunt to. So it's. Freaking freezing like urine flip flops YouTube grabbed the rope that they give you and everything but it's still I mean keep in mind it's twenty degree sure Danny it's a whole call. So when you initially walked out there. It's a pretty long walk you don't you you it's tough and you just shook off the statue you can hang your crap up and you just get into that hot. So that's basically look goes down now. There's these two dudes in there they're college age kids and they're from New Zealand and they're there on holiday in these guys are having a blast aren't. They are having a great time they're young they're drunk. They are loved in life there in the hot tub they're drunk they're having a lot of fun now what you have to envision when you walk up to this hot up. When I think it's twenty degrees. It's twenty degrees. There is like H view of a Clough of warm air that you can see from the water unum saying as far as you're hot to I just steam coming jets got this little bubble in your. Even when you kind of sit down and you're in this you're in this steamy bubble. And so diet doesn't that sound appeal but I know what you're saying it's like dress like just this hot bubble Joyner Steve rebound right so we sit down in this thing that game Meebo will we start to we start we start we start talking to the guys in front of us and they run out of beer. So the one guy. Decides that the other guys you'll get it. Because he got the last time is like you just don't want to get. Front basically that's it when your in there and you do not want to get out because it is just bone chillingly cold when you get out of this. I've done it so ski resort so the one guy he's just sits there. It is like I'm not gonna go and the other guy goes on god dammit Colin whatever they want. He grabs a pitcher in just jumps up and his buddies left my car. And then all of a sudden. With smelled like an overturned truck of eggs in the death smell it. Comes our way and I mean this being is. Vick in these latter is I'm sorry obsessed by this practice it says but he's he's laughing so good of his body but we're just like over there like. All god exists it is bad like this is bad bad badly to the point where I got out from it like to coach the event they don't I got out a development how to get back end. Because it was so cold and then we got that feels like it was just like he walked right back down and totally stayed in the yeah stated that little area yeah and when he's bunny comes back with a pitcher appears he's like oh my god do they have the number were outside bracket we are outside this thing will not leave this little heated the bubble area of all this stuff Stephen king's under the dome and then another couple comes up and they sit in it and the woman goes oh my god oh god oh god they ended nobody calls the body as a departed but it was like five minutes ago. It's easier to come back with a pitcher. Inability to come back with a pitcher. He got cups for us because he just kind of fell bachelor servers I hear council barbarian us percent of their and I swear to god and that thing. I mean you know after awhile. Even if there's fart in the room or in the area. You kind of get used to it to the point where it's not as bad as it was before her looking yeah you don't think your body has accepted that this guy going into this did not happen but you just kept smelling like he didn't dissipate well any part of underwater so didn't all come out one bubble so that every couple minutes another bubble far comes out. But why do Ford's underwater smells some abilities are concentrate no I don't normally if you are in the shower if you for a bath tub and that that little bubble popped but when I think power some surfaces are all like are you fared in the shower is gross. I it it looked where are far pretty much anywhere that is one place I really tried not to sometimes you have to do and you think this I would be different it's not any different it's just as bad as the was the last time you made the decision partnership and mentally can think is a wanna get out of the shower and also avoid the part sticking to me. Yeah the Philly you'll destroy that far all day like you know part of eight hours ago I don't know its giant asteroid deodorant in fart. So. That his buddy called and write and say hey you far yes all right so every year on Easter I go over it to east part of state and going hockey trip with our buddy Steve mix rightly hockey. So we're drinking Beers and everything the whole time his other buddies or playing hockey is one guy Munson. He fart in the beer garden at the hockey rinks so bad and he's laughing about it and it's like clear in the whole beer garden right but it's no doubt that it pops. Not only us it's specific that it's his months in character has defended the way he's laughing and easy laugh being it he's owning up to apparently eat. It's awful really because of your worst ones like that are one of my worst ones like on that level to think this is all. So you fast forward. Hours from now right now we're out of the bar right now there are some people whose bar that are also account for the hockey tournament. So he floats another far right now and he doesn't say anything this time but you could see people reacting is the bar is going through and there's a circle of people. In a girl who had been in the beer garden earlier just turns around and does. Analyze and it's no. You probably somebody in the an open fire I know that it's. Open earlier this boat which currently. Unpleasant day weather come from you or someone else what is your big part story we have on here as we go down under no pun intended a group of scientists in Australia. Just completed the first successful test some new invention a little electronic pill that you swallowed to monitor the flatulence in your stuff. And it actually lets you watch the flatulence forming in real time on yourself it's gonna double practical applications they say the red pill. Isn't like matrix stuff friend. I didn't see auto air strike threat to sit and as practical application it like seeing what foods give you gas come on man. No food give you gas actually you would be some truck not surprised that the food to give you got like beans that has always been a musical fruit I don't they know what I'm saying is that's beans they say don't really give you gas not as much as people think it's but what I'm saying is this though. The foods that may or may not give you gas in new mayor ray and I know those who can put you know would your average diet is in the you know what foods made. You fought now apple won't universally made people far because look. So my food to make everyone far and so foods that make. You for. Yeah you know I'm mildly lactose and you don't know little foods I mean because your mildly lactose intolerant you you know those foods I have no doubt what foods but we've far end the war in the bowels remote honestly in its I don't know what is. It's like garlic. It throws ago. But I love roasted garlic in a worse thing is I mean it works or we quake but we knew forward it solely for him roasted garlic in somehow. Somehow makes it work it. It makes it worse if we knew fart it's still Marr at least Wheldon who drew a material turner had a right it's like when you're not alone in an upper in your book tastes like whatever you ate even though you like what it tastes like you don't like him on the flip side. And somehow makes a grocery right so you fart and it's like ma'am. And I don't care who you like I could pardon a studio in new would tell me man I know for a fact purist or garlic because I can smiled roasted garlic in it among. All the other stuff the comes along with Teddy knows. You are certain certainty or can you identify the foods that make you guess you because I don't thing I can't I don't think I know but I'd have been tonight if I eat. I got bungee cheese or like. Three or four piece of pizza Pena and coming out of gas but I think to myself was like super lactose intolerant Brett but just affairs and ups there's a level of cheese right now all right. If we're gonna order in the morning boy your body's gonna break down the lactose right no question but like for you need to do is to give them. Itty bitty bit man and it is the one that I think I can smell the next day is if I eat really good barbecue. I feel like when I parred the next day it smells a little smoky what the whole hall humble I think. And Amir. However we should feel better because there's something that you smell would you like but I don't know why but it makes it so much worse like. It and I think it's really grossly give you Farnham late. Ted and you have are ridiculous because you fared and any kind of smoothly barbecue. Yeah like I'm not big bathroom talker but in Dallas Saturday night we have a bunch of barbecue great party that hoped yet the next morning. I'll pull pin and I literally got out of the bathroom like. I just beeped out our who don't hold brief for that if you don't like rim yeah. Both the won't make their mouth water and debris twenty years ago it was a stuff that they used to start to they started using in my potato chips and stuff that just let's Alessio what are ran right through everybody. Oh and how you like debate chips are you add all kinds of other stuff out but that okay so. That trend happened. An and they basically took that off the market basically because it was giving people gassed and I mean so that was the reasoning for that now. My cock has the story coming up about Coca-Cola and just. The other day they announced. Four new flavors of their diet soda and they also introduced a new kid. OK so the kid has more of a taller skew your cane. And the flavors garlic Red Bull folks is very diet or whatever they try to trying to get the croc. With a volume of the hard water they're trying to get the soda water people right because that's what Moline meals are drinking more of these days they're trying to get more of a millennial crowd. A Coca-Cola realizes that. The majority of people who are continually buying the products are aging getting older you're not picking up any of the younger demographics continue to cents. Right so legally change all this now we have this study. As it says between the zero calorie label. Andy delicious flavor of sparkling waters it seems like a relatively healthy option for an afternoon. Drank. But could drinking too much sparkling water give you gas our hopes those there are very interesting side effect of drinking sparkling water Deep Purple I'm all for the most part people do feel they say may be a little bit more bloated and guessing the truth there's a little bit more complicated for the most part it's amid the carbonated water gauge gas but. If your daddy can't sparkling water or a couple of them a day. Yeah you might be prone to some digest of issues especially. They are recommend curbing your LeCroy have a. Doesn't make sense and look I don't know guardedly water is sort of errant only. Interviews while also glimpse into these may even bubbles and champagne because I was do you drink more of this campaign. I hope in anyone's city doesn't make sense that something you. That's enough of the bubbles is gonna have roughly the same effect right. I mean I guess I took a lot of soda water but I never thought the thing in the morning time I was gonna fire but I never thought about it three or four soda wars about it and making them act and it. Do you know the biggest provider of parting you got to prevent parts stitcher but shut I have no idea. The other side Belgian. Oh yes because if you belch the gas instead of being trapped in your stomach when once it's in your soft does get that out of you before you gets down no. Why do that I can bump and finally we let the difference to me like look. If you bird you just Burke but when you fart at least some people like myself find it very fun even sparkling water is not 100% great for either say be on causing gas minor bloating. Drinking too much sparkling water has been willing to UT. Erosion due to the acidity luckily however there are few ways to minimize suburban enjoy each sips they say drink less about the way the other additive that they put and remember this now comment came in that reminded me. There wasn't so much about flatulence what would emerald was at the replaced. In the end that chips Mac O illustrate a diarrhea or other anal leakage through advanced hood they didn't say that it but here's the difference. When you have diarrhea you have diarrhea the diarrhea is our man I have to go to the bathroom because I'm in that state April linkages. Male I think I think maybe we had to put myself a look because. When you pulled the pulled leakage indicates that it was not intentional also able to get dislike well. It's not exactly diarrhea but by the time you teach you to go to the bathroom you realize your behalf done yes Stephen I had this conversation the other day it's a it's a strange thing people alike talk about it it's one of those underbelly things are no one wants to mention that it happens leakage. Just the idea of like most the time to go the bathroom you're gonna go number yeah actually I was kind of a carrier and I'll tell up or down to number two but sometimes you you slip or maybe it's just what's going on downstairs and you just need to go in there and wiping get out what we've said there were Ed and not all the about garrido might not actual whooping now PD go in and I like wow that miles Simon incident as a man you know how many times and all the years we don't traditionally those times where. This article you slipped on a farm so it's not that it's just in the course of doing the show. You know you know bringing it up on the air remembering what each other but sort of make your head like. About the leaking into my underwear and my I am getting swampy in uncomfortable in the new go to the bathroom Hewlett almighty god may. The other day right when I walked in my door. Right when I walked in my door good I started started getting sick it was the first day that I was really really sick. Thank god it was right when I walked in my door but I do have this. Flight of steps that gonna go up right away. So I'm clinching and you don't mean because I don't. It's carpet and yeah I Wear shorts and I'd. I'm your house it's my house and I said she was that an idea about my carpet and those are more than have been OK good clean up easier man you don't really know why do you like I don't want. You know it's in this media be different bills the dog shorter so really I had but I don't have a dog I could explain this. Goodman and audited era to guard me. Natalie and easily walked in your door you open your door to him like you've got to be kidding me man we were just having Iran and random conversation about this and it just happened to be with a signal but how did you mean. I think you knocked into it. It does seem like would you know you gotta go so my you have that ultimately could do him one you know it is you know when you really got to go ensures feel everything going on but the closer you seem to get even if you've brands even even holding it for fifteen minutes or two hours the closer you get to being able to let go about my authority like. In fast forward motion like come on get their body. The only idea and it and then get there. If he didn't make. Well we knew our proud of him that I just took off my pants and put everything at a loss here in my car I. Whenever you're someone else what is your epic part story four point 999 all hold the line Morey calls on the way you are listening to the men's or radio network. Joseph you know have turned Manning's room. Had just coming up email the bad jokes in the men's room mad men's or live dot com we'll get on the bad jokes right before we drink it tells with the shots of the day our question. Whether from you are someone else what is your epic fared story 844999. Cola hello Robert welcome to the older. Should get real the ticket. Or not I don't know Roberts. Are well. Do you mean in conversations that start out that her abode in opposite gadgets. So what is your outlook I don't know. 1213 years old. Of buddy of mine wore out in his father's garage and or what they have Dion. We are using the air compressor and our our pit them. Neck and all this sort of thing to just picked epic Portnoy discuss what you know you are all very thirteen year it'll soon. Town but it's like you bigoted little idea to put this air compressor in between these cheeks Q you know really imitate via the noise. Yeah first couple three go off without a hitch. Fourth when you can pull the trigger you know annoyed but if I gate issue. Throughout the compressor handling take off running and how I mean hot pursuit and I'm already laughing I got there have been no way. He makes into the bathroom slammed the door and you can hear this. It's not even a trumpet come full scuba it's just echoing through the week off the wall it it's an error Panama. How long he held on either team gonna kill himself or sore but how long into the Fargo on. I. In my head at thirteen years old it would. Probably minutes but honestly it was less than that put a good 32 easy I'm I'm turning blue I'm laughing so hard I can barely breathe out in the hallway. And you can just hear him kind of grown in the wind and about it but the initial. Urged that lasted got a good thirty seconds or by second but from the rest of the day he was walking around looking perhaps sick and just let not being mauled. In namely long far. You're right though it's it's it's an area and you put an end their bodies like no. I'm they get an out. And improbably whatever additional four material he had a Palin was is due at all Orleans. All yeah yeah you can hear the the impact of the material and the water it was it was intent. It. I don't know what makes him so happy it just does it wouldn't you know you're right you're the right age and like right now my son is very proud because he's learned to make himself broke. When you get good to me it's right pass and play hard Microsoft filed so. He's kind of bragging to humble bragging that he can do this now and I showed a mop like mommy and you can do like this do big burst. The thing that blows my noticing can do an armpit far and it looks really get what is that actually news to your hand and we are bitten do it. And my son's eyes on next to got right now an analyst pathetic I know it's sad but this was. The great to say I believe this was just last week and then it started a couple I wonder equate the new slogan drill was we want and he just thinks this is. The most amazing thing. What I like about it is about the next fifteen minutes or realize that he's a walk around the chicken when Jennifer did and it is cynical dude everything he can't try to come over the party can't master that's a look man. I can't really show you how it's done you've got to cover it did it right but once you know it. You know and do the through rested alive and dead 48 get through it still an old lead it never ever. I would try all I've been tried and a lot Barbara apart yeah do you root for a non. Did honestly I could never delete it. Now come home alien doesn't. As you do it's I used two hands over my mouth. Where we have got to Sardinia to that was the route and I couldn't get like a good juices. And I'll get guerrilla what I thought. I would take a break maiden. All right tired after this makeup Art Howe is with your mouth what I. I thought it adds I knew I knew my ears is well look our stations are gonna jump on in a second here and here this first time. Are pleasant weather for you are someone else why did you have the five story 44999. Obama. The shenanigans continues on the men's room radio network.
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